The Call...

The week of February 10th started like any other week; work, chores, work, grocery shop, work, etc. We got a call this week from our social worker with information about a potential birth mother. She gave me all the details that she had and asked if our profile could be viewed. Of course, we said yes. This would be the 6th time that our profile would be viewed. We have been viewed a lot in a short amount of time but we were tired of being viewed and not picked. We were trying to trust God with His timing.

As I've done with all the other times we were being viewed, I spent the week praying for the birth mother, for the viewing, for God's direction and clear answer, and for peace and patience for Donny and I. Our profile was scheduled to be viewed on Wednesday, February 19th. I was so anxious but I'm always anxious about a viewing. I thought Wednesday would never come, the week seemed to creep by. Meanwhile, Donny and I went through the motions of the week and acted like nothing was going on.

God has really used this adoption process to address my need for control. To address it He took it all away from me in a way I've never experienced. When you're adopting you have absolutely no control over anything except agreeing to have your profile viewed. Everything else is up to someone else; a total stranger, and the Lord. Sitting and waiting has never been my strong suit. I feel the need to be doing something when I have no control over a situation. So, the dishes got done every night, I hosted a girls night with a few of my sweet friends, laundry got done, and I started a little sewing project. I was trying to keep busy but was praying constantly about Wednesday.

Wednesday morning I was at work, sick to my stomach. My nerves had gotten away from me. I wanted this to be the one so badly. I was so tired of waiting. Our profile had only been public since November 2013 but we had been trying to get things going for almost 5 years. Our social worker was suppose to call or email if the birth mother made a decision. I was checking my phone every 5 minutes. I text Donny at 9:53 telling him I was so nervous my stomach hurt. He asked why and apparently had forgotten our profile was being viewed that day. This is what he sent back to me.... "I want you to try and not get so anxious every time our profile is shown. It will drive you batty. Yes we need to think and pray on it, but I don't think that we need to dwell on it. More times than not, nothing good comes from being anxious. Try and place it in God's hands and know that He knows who our child is and when that child's birth mother is ready He will send her looking for us. I love you very much sweets and I am so blessed that you will be the mother of our children. Psalm 27:13-14 'I would have despaired unless I had believed that I would see the goodness of The Lord in the land of the living. Wait for The Lord; be strong and let your heart take courage; Yes, wait for The Lord." Well, now I was near tears at work. What a sweet man God has blessed me with!

Lunch break came and I decided I just needed to try and relax for the hour. I went and got some lunch and decided to join some co-workers in the break room. As I was eating I realized I hadn't checked my phone in over 40 minutes. I grabbed it from my purse and sure enough I had a missed call from the agency. I stepped outside for some privacy to call them back. I was sweating! This was either going to be really good news or another non-pick. I called and our social worker picked right up. After exchanging greetings I heard these wonderful words, "I have some good news for you guys." I was trying to stay calm but instantly started crying and freaking out a little at the sound of those words.

Me: Yeah?
SW: She picked you guys!
Me: O my God, O my God (while crying and laughing)
SW: laughing
Me: (when I finally composed myself) So, what do we do now?
SW: Well, she would like to meet you guys before having the baby. (She gave me a few dates to consider as well as the due date and some other info.)
Me: I gotta go talk to Donny. Ill call you back. O my gosh this is the best phone call ever!

I was shell shocked! I stood outside for a few seconds trying to gather myself. It felt hard to breathe. My mind was racing. I had no idea what to do or say. I was just standing there. My heart felt like it was going to beat right out of my chest. I kept thinking "a baby, a baby is coming." I had to get to Donny. I grabbed my stuff and jumped in my car. On my way to Donny's work I called mine and told them that I had to get some information for the agency from Donny and it couldn't wait so I didn't know when I would be back to work. Thankfully, I work for and with some really understanding people and we happened to be pretty slow that day.

I drove to Donny's work faster than I probably should have. I was screaming in my car and thanking God over and over again and begging Him not to let her change her mind. I decided what I would say to tell Donny but of course, things did not go as I had planned. When I got to Donny's work he was really busy with a few customers so I had to sit and wait. It took forever! Then when he was finally done he was talking to me about the busy day he was having and could I hold on he needed to make a phone call. I was about to burst out of my skin! Finally he had a moment.

D: So, what are you doing here?
M: (smiling super big and cheesy) Why do you think I'm here?
D: I don't know.
Silence, me waiting for it to dawn on him which it did not. And then I forgot how I had planned on telling him so I just said it.
M: She picked us!
D: What?
M: She picked us!
D: She picked us?
M: Yes! And the baby is due 4/23!
Donny turned a little white and just sat there looking at me. Not the response I was expecting. He finally got up and hugged me, crying. And this is where my memory fails me. I don't remember what we said next. I just remember we were both crying and hugging each other over and over in the middle of Idler's. Again, I'm not sure of all that happened next. Things are kind of a blur in my mind. I know that we talked about dates to meet the birth mother. I know I called the agency back. And then we had to get back to work. Poor Donny still looked a little shocked. He told me later that he didn't get much done the rest of the day. He just couldn't focus.

Next I headed to my moms work. I just couldn't wait until after five. On my way I called all three of my sisters multiple times. Non of them picked up. What the heck!!! This is one of the most important days of my life and all of a sudden no one has time to pick up the phone?!!! ;)

Again, while driving, I planned some cute way to tell my mom. That didn't happen either. I just couldn't contain myself. I burst into her office and yelled "Baby Stiver is due April 23!" Of course there was screaming, jumping, and crying involved. :)

On my way back to work I finally got a hold of one of the sisters, Tammera. She screamed all these things that I couldn't understand. And of course, there was crying. I also got a hold of my Papa. Now that was a sweet phone call. This will be his ninth great grandchild.

Back at work I was totally useless. I couldn't focus on a single thing. I was out back checking in a few cars while still trying to get a hold of the other sisters. I did finally. Both conversations were about the same. They picked up, both said hello but in the "what's going tone" since they had like 5 missed calls from me, all I said was "she picked us", and what followed was screaming and crying and pure joy. It was freakin' awesome!!

Of course, Donny told his side of the family. I'm not sure how all those conversations went but I know a few people cried. We are so blessed to be so supported by all our family and friends.

God had finally answered our prayers, we had been picked!!! Other than the day I got married, this was the most special, important day in my life. Until April came....... :)